Self Respect

“The shaft of the arrow had been feathered with one of the eagle's own plumes. We often give our enemies the means of our own destruction.”

--Aesop--

“Respect yourself and others will respect you.”

--Confucius--

A long time ago, when I was a little kid there was a local phrase that went “quit drinking someone else’s Kool Aid.” It meant to stop buying someone else’s propaganda that they were better than you. Well, maybe it is time someone said that to the African-American community because we have been “drinking someone else’s Kool Aid” for far too long.

What am I talking (well writing) about? I am talking about how we give our power away everyday because we have been so brainwashed into believing in fairy tales, fiction, and propaganda. We must start exercising more independent thought and we must be willing to challenge old, popular, and convenient notions. I will give an example.

Over a year ago I wrote an article about how the University of Notre Dame insulted the African-American community by treating the only African-American Head Football Coach in their long and illustrious history differently than any other coach in the past several decades. Notre Dame fired Coach Willingham before he finished his first contract, even though the university had allowed the coach before Willingham, who had about the same record, to finish his contract before they fired him. As I mentioned in my previous article, it was an insult to the African-American community because it appears that Willingham received the quick hook because of the color of his skin.

Yet, after the firing we remained silent. Our community and our leaders remained silent. We remained silent as the new coach of Notre Dame came to our community without being required to explain the university’s actions. We remained silent as the university recruited several young brothers from our community without any repercussions. We remained silent as the media hyped the new coach to near mythical levels even though the new coach did not have a better record than Willingham in his first two seasons. We remained silent as the new coach of Notre Dame received a contract extension even though he had not delivered a bowl victory or a better season than Willingham. And we are silent still even though the media has started to finally shed some light on Notre Dame’s actions.

The worst part of this sad example is all we needed to have done was to have a little respect for ourselves and to have acted like it. This is an example where we did not have to hold large public protests or any protests. We did not need our “anointed” leaders to make a public stink over Willingham’s firing. We just needed to send a firm clear message by sending our football talent else where. If the big name recruits as well as the “little name” recruits from our community made it clear that Notre Dame was persona non grata then the message would have been sent loud and clear. Instead, we sent a message that our community can be insulted indirectly and we will not do anything without one of our “anointed” leaders or the media telling “us” to be outraged.

I want to be very clear. The Willingham firing by Notre Dame was not about one brother’s job. It was about opportunity. It was about fairness. It was about respect. If he was treated differently because of the color of his skin then it was a direct insult and challenge to all of “us” and it was and still is in the individual self interest of all of “us” to address this wrong. Would any school publicly announce that black folks are only good enough to help their football team win games as athletes but they are not good enough to be the team’s head coach? How was the Willingham situation that different? Yes it may have been a little more subtle but I think the message was the same.

I also want to point out that I am in no way suggesting that all people or even most people from Notre Dame are racists or feel that way. If most people from Notre Dame are like the people I know from Notre Dame, I am certain they are not racists. However, they are not the people that needed to have been sent a message. The people that influenced the Willingham firings should have and still need to be sent a message. It is called R-E-S-P-E-C-T!

The situation at Notre Dame was only one of many examples of how our actions or lack there of actually help our oppressors to continue to oppress “us.” How can we ever expect to build power if we allow others to do whatever they want to us and not only do we allow it we even help them? How can we ever expect respect from others when clearly we do not respect ourselves? The truth is we can not and we should not.

We must respect ourselves. We must start to define ourselves. We must start to think for ourselves. And we must start drinking our own Kool Aid.

Comments

[Karl]

This is an old issue, I believe most have boycotted supporting the university as much as an individual can. Do not watch, buy any ND products and tell any up and coming athletes to go somewhere else. By the way, Willingham's recruit are all gone now so this current coach has a recruiting problem. Hey Hey Notre Dame 0-10!

[BEB]

Karl,

I agree with the vast majority of your comment except the part about this being an old issue. It is not. If you watch any of Notre Dame's games (which I do hoping they will lose) you will see that the majority of their "skilled" players are African American. Plus, according to the media (and I understand that they have a habit of overstating things) Notre Dame had a great recruiting year last year. I mention this to make the point that too many of "us" still have not gotten the memo. We are still way too used to taking marching orders from our so called leaders so we only act when we are told to.

[Afro American]

It was nice to read your topic and the line “Respect yourself and others will respect you.” It is too necessary to respect our self
bcoz if you are not respecting your self then the other person are neglecting you. And the African American have a very good history and present and future.In any Olympics the usa win most of the medal by African American person.

[AJ]

Much respect to your original argument. I feel that it is well stated and worthwhile. I do feel the pain of another brother receiving unfair treatment, however, when do we stop going to institutions such as Notre Dame, a school that clearly does not represent the interests of the black community (especially not the inner city core and rural heritage of our race). I understand that HBCU's do not pay as well and do not receive the notoriety of these "big name schools", but why is that - we don't pump our money and energies into these institutions that were at one time all that we had. We could empower ourselves in so many ways, but instead we go begging an "Irish" (as in fighting Irish) for a job, or as some say, a handout. No doubt, I am sure that Willingham is well qualified to handle ND, Florida, OSU, or any other school. Forget Notre Dame and the rest, coach a SWAC or MEAC school and set the bar high. Demand that these schools get the fair recruitment and financial opportunities that are afforded other public and private schools in this country. We've got to stop going to school just to get a job from someone who does little, if anything, for our communities; and that includes not teaching us to return to our old neighborhoods and help uplift and rebuild. And hey, HBCU's have to do better as well - and I say that as an alumnus fighting daily to improve such. I just urge us to look within sometimes, the answer may be in our own back yard.