Common Knowledge

It Is Time For Something New

“A great marriage is not when the 'perfect couple' comes together. It is when an imperfect couple learns to enjoy their differences.”

Dave Meurer

“Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution yet.”

Mae West

“By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.”

Socrates

                Are black men much more likely to shy away from marriage than other men?  Well, it seems it depends upon who you talk to.  If you talk to some sisters that statement might ring as true as the sky is blue.  If you talk to other sisters that statement may seem untrue.  If you talk to most brothers that statement not only rings untrue, it smacks of betrayal! 

                There are a number of black women out there that truly believe that black men as a whole are much less likely to get married than other men.  I heard that indictment over and over again.  Each time I heard that statement I have usually championed the brothers’ defense. However, I have tried to listen to what sisters have had to say over the years.  And what I have been able to understand is that some sisters feel that there is a shortage of “good,” meaning educated, employed, and desirable, black men in this country.  They feel that because of that shortage there are much more “good” black women to every “good” black man so the “good” black men have an advantage that we exploit.  I think some sisters feel that because of this advantage black men shy away from getting married and prefer to “play the field” as long as we can before we finally settle down if ever.

                There are a number of brothers that feel that that generalization is unfair and untrue.  They feel that some sisters only see a certain type of brother, i.e. the brother with money, a fancy title, a nice car, a big house, etc.  They feel that many of these sisters aren’t interested in being married to a good brother as opposed to someone who can financially take care of them.  Brothers also feel that only the sisters that are dissatisfied seem to get most of the attention.  We feel that the media does not seem to notice the ones of us that are married.  For example, I have been married for nearly five years. Many of my friends are also married.  Six out of eight of my line brothers are married.  All but one of the brothers that moved to Illinois that graduated a year before me, with me, or a after me from law school are married. 

                Yet, both of these points of view tell me one thing: the statement that black men are less likely to get married than other men is not the base problem.  It is a symptom of a host of issues that very few people, black, white, Asian, Hispanic or Romulan, take time to think about much less discuss or deal with.  There is the main issue of mistrust and disharmony that is the product of a host of issues.  There is the issue of male/female tensions about the continued gender roles in today’s two income families.  There is the issue of what does a “good” brother or sister mean.  There is the issue of is it okay to look for a man with financial means.  There is the issue of whether appearance matter when looking for a wife or a husband.  What about sex?  Does getting married mean good bye to fun sex?  How has the progress of the black female in the work place that has out distanced black male progress in the work place affected black male/female marriage rates?  How is our current culture that is fascinated by money, glamour, looks and youth affecting and will affect black male/female marriage rates?  Is everyone really made to be married?  And why do we get married in the first place?  These issues have an affect on how black men and women approach choosing when, who, and under what conditions to get married.

                Although, I do not believe that black men are unlike any other men when it comes to propensity to get married, I do think there could be some small amount of truth embedded in the statement.  However, regardless of what the truth is, maybe it is about time for us black folks to start looking beyond the surface frustrations of allegations.  Maybe it is time to start looking at the reasons for the beliefs or realities.  Maybe it is time to deal with the root issues so that we can cut down the tree of mistrust and disharmony.

Are You Educated or Are You Certified?

“It is possible to store the mind with a million facts and still be entirely uneducated.”

--Alec Bourne--

“Only the educated are free.”

--Epictetus--

                One of the most important things that we can do as a community is to learn for ourselves and teach our children how to become independent thinkers.  Why is this important?  It is important because the first, only, and best place to imprison someone is between their two ears.  We can not continue the progress of our ancestors towards real equality without building power and we can not build power by accepting and following the old notions of cultures and institutions that were created and maintained to keep us powerless.  Of course this then leads one to ask the questions “what is an independent thinker and how do you become one?”  Well the how is closely connected to the what.  I guess the best way to start is to ask “are you educated or are you certified?”

Years ago when I was in basic training one of my drill sergeants asked me if I was educated or certified.  Since I had already received my bachelor’s degree before I entered the Army I told my drill sergeant, with a little smugness, that of course I was educated.  I went on to explain to him that the difference between being educated and certified is the institution and program that one attends.  I told him that an educated person is someone who has a college degree whereas a certified person is someone that has a certificate, usually someone that has completed a short term course in a less rigorous field like a trade or something similar.  My sergeant looked me in the eye with a mixed look of humor and pity and promptly enlightened me.  He told me that I was wrong.  He told me that I was in fact certified and it remained to be seen if I was educated.  He adroitly explained that being educated only means that you have knowledge and that knowledge can come from formal as well as informal sources.  He also explained that my college degree is only a certification by the university that I attended that I have completed a requisite number of classes in my major course of study.  I never forgot that lesson.

                Most people look at college graduates as well educated people.  As a matter of fact universities are referred to and have historically been called institutions of higher learning or higher education.  Yet, how many people do you know have degrees in areas that they can barely remember much if anything about their major?  How many people do you know are able to reiterate ideas and concepts that they learned in college but have not ever taken the time to contemplate their real meaning or to challenge those ideas and concepts continued validity in today’s reality?  How many people do you know have degrees in philosophy, history, or some other social science but can not name any significant philosophers or historians?  How many people do you know have business degrees but are not able to apply different theories of management or finance or marketing to real situations in the work place regardless of whether they are working for someone or working for themselves?  And how many of us have accepted the values of others as we chased “accomplishments” for no other reason than that is what we are supposed to do?  Well, those are not the actions of an educated person, if we equate educated with knowledgeable, intelligent or wise. 

                There are too many of us that go to college looking for that pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, but are disappointed and disillusioned when we graduate.   There are too many of us that major in areas of demand in hopes of getting “a good job” upon graduation, but after working in that “good job” are disappointed or disillusioned about our future career opportunities.  There are too many of us that look to U.S. News & World Report Magazine to make our decisions for us when choosing an undergraduate college or law school or medical school or dental school or graduate school to attend as if universities are like college basketball or football teams and thus can be ranked in descending order of utility that is applicable to everyone.  There are too many of us that accept the thinking, priorities and values of the “majority culture” and therefore at times allow the “majority culture” to determine the value of our community or our history or our institutions.

                Education can come from many sources.  It can come from formal sources like universities.  It can come from informal sources like self study through reading, researching, and inquiring.  And it also can come by experience.  However, it can not nor will not come by accepting the assumptions of others without question, inquiry, and reflection.  We as individuals must be independent thinkers so that we individually and collectively can define ourselves for ourselves.  We must be independent thinkers so that we can avoid the trap of fighting for the crumbs from the table of elitist when we should be sitting at the table carving out our own share.  We must be independent thinkers so that we can avoid allowing the media to tell us who our leaders are or what we want out of life or what it really means to be “black.”  We must become independent thinkers so that we can stop playing the game on the terms of the old guard and start playing the game on our terms. So I ask the question again are you educated or are you certified?

Issues Management

“Politics is the art of preventing people from taking part in affairs which properly concern them.”

Paul Valery

            The politics of race is about as old as the politics of fear.  As a matter of fact, many times they are inseparable.  This has been true in America and is also true in our communities.  There have been and continues to be too many politicians that come to our communities looking for votes based on fear or race.  The harm in this situation is that this strategy usually works for those politicians.  Therefore once they are elected they are not required by our community to address real issues that the government can and should address.  They are instead given the keys to our neighborhoods, by ward, or by congressional districts, or by cities, or by states, and the only thing that they are required to do is to keep us scared or at odds against another racial group.  In short they are not required to be a problem solver for problems that the government can work with the community to solve; they are instead allowed to stay in office without addressing our issues.  It is not a bad set up.  That is why throughout history this strategy has worked so well.  It worked for the democrats after reconstruction to give them control of the south until the Republican Party went from the party of Lincoln to the party of Barry Goldwater. 

This strategy also worked and continues to work each presidential election cycle.  The vast majority of African-Americans vote democrat.  Yet, how much have the democrats delivered to the African-American community in the past forty years?  For example, let’s look at the nation’s capital.  It is a city/state with a population of over a half million people.  The nation’s capital has been a stronghold for the Democrat Party for decades and it has also been majority African-American for decades as well.  Yet, how is it that the nation’s capital can be held without a vote in the very body that has the ultimate control in governing it?  And how could the party that is supposed to have been our “friends” not been able to have the wherewithal to correct this situation, when this party at one time during the past forty years had majorities in both chambers of the United States Congress, the Office of the President and most state assemblies and governor’s mansions?  The answer is simple.  When little is required, even less is received.

                That is usually the case.  Although, the continuance of the disenfranchisement of the District of Columbia is not just an African American issue it is an illustrative example of a real meat and potatoes issue that has not been addressed.  The politics of race and the politics of fear are usually very successful with few if any negative consequences for the politician or party that uses those strategies.  Well, of course there is the recent exception of the embarrassment that the Bush Administration suffered when they attempted to push the Dubai deal through.  This is the exception not the rule. 

For the record, I am not currently a republican nor am I a democrat; although in the spirit of open disclosure I have voted for more democrats than republicans.  I have also grown leery of party labels because I feel that the process of selecting people for public office should be based on issues of concern to the voters.  It should not be treated as a name brand label as if one was purchasing some laundry detergent or an outfit; nor should it be based on irrelevant things like image, i.e. he’s a good family man, or fear or even just the race of a candidate alone. 

How many of us have lived or currently live in neighborhoods that are underdeveloped, underserved, and unappreciated, but continues to send our local representative to City Council or State Assembly or the United States Congress term after term after term because they are supposedly looking out for us?  How many of us have heard politicians that preach their love for education but somehow is not able to figure out how to help build and maintain a public school system that will educate all of our children, not just the good standardized test takers?  But these folks keep getting elected election after election after election.

It is time for our community to start requiring more than just entertainment in the guise of real political debate.  It is time for our community to look beyond the superficial layers of fear or racial opportunism to really access what we want from our elected officials.  We need to get into the practice of asking ourselves what are our issues and get away from letting someone else tell us what issues are important or even necessary to us.  Once we start challenging ourselves to reflect on what we want from our elected officials than we will be in a better position to resist the politics of fear and racial opportunism.

All Hands Are Needed On Deck

“First it is necessary to stand on your own two feet.   But the minute a man finds himself in that position, the next thing he should do is reach out his arms.”

---Kristin Hunter---

Last week I stated that I would share my ideas about what can be done to promote African-American economic empowerment.  Well, the first thing I must say is that I am not so conceited to believe that in my few years on this earth I came up with a solution to a situation that has been going on for over four hundred years. My idea is not meant to be a panacea to our collective economic situation.  I am certain that there are many different ways of attacking our economic situation as a community.  I am also certain that several different remedies will need to be applied before we will be able to raise our economic status.  However, I do think that we must develop, maintain and then integrate our networks. 

When I talk about building a network I do not mean “networking” in the manner that it has traditionally been used.  I don’t mean parties that are passed off as “networking” opportunities.  I don’t mean “get togethers” where everyone is putting on airs and trying to impress the finest woman or man in the room or trying to establish an edge over all the brothers or sisters in the room.   Nor am I talking about sporadic functions that are nothing more than social pick up opportunities.  I am talking about establishing African-American sub-communities around certain trades or professions.  An example of a type of a sub-community is the Cook County Bar Association.  This is the Bar Association for the African-American community that practice in Cook County.  I have had the pleasure of meeting different African-American lawyers that practice in Chicago through my involvement in the Cook County Bar Association.  I have also been able to do the same in Washington, D.C. with the Washington Bar Association. 

A network is a sub-community of people that share interests that stem from a profession, a trade or an ethnic or racial community. It is normally established by a group of people with common interests getting to know one another and establishing social and commercial ties.  How would that make a difference in building economic power in our community?  Well, it will help in several ways.  One it will help in circulating job opportunities in our community.  According to statistics, only about twenty percent of the jobs that are available at any given time are advertised.  That means that eighty percent of the jobs that are available are never advertised and that many of the people who are filling these jobs are probably getting their opportunities through someone that they know, i.e. a network.  Another opportunity that networks present are business opportunities.  The more people that you know the more potential business opportunities.  Everyone is not necessarily interested in started or maintaining their own business, but the people from our community who are interested would be better served the better all of our networks are maintained.   When I was in undergrad, I had the opportunity to join Alpha Phi Alpha Fraternity, Inc.  When I was on line we were told that our line was only as strong as our weakest link.  Well, the same is true for our community.   

We already have the makings of many large and prosperous networks today.  We just need to use what we already have available to us.  If you went to college that is a potential network.  If you served in the military that is a potential network.  If you went to high school that is a potential network. If you joined a fraternity or a sorority that is a potential network.  If you are a plumber or an electrician or a carpenter or a doctor or a lawyer or a small businessperson or an accountant, these are all potential networks.  We just need to one understand our opportunities and two stop believing in the propaganda of rugged individualism.  No one gets to the top completely by themselves.  There is an old Native American saying that “many hands make light work.” We have a lot of work to do in order to promote African-American empowerment.